All of these pro-life posts, Jon Scharfenberger’s death, the reunion between Penelope and Odysseus in the Odyssey, Jay’s texting me to ask to share an umbrella while we walk to Mass together in an hour… what’s the deal?
I know I’m sleep deprived, but not any more than normal. Maybe it’s just God’s reminder that as long as I’m learning and able to stay in school, the letter grade I get is just that - a letter.
Am I the only one who thinks there is about as much foreshadowing in real life as there is in the Bible? Father Mark always used to preach that students realize that they are more than their GPA, and that grades, while important, aren’t the most important thing. I’ve always tried my best in school, and my best has always supplied me with straight A’s. Now things are harder and I’m struggling, but I’m trying to remember that my GPA really isn’t the most important. I know that in my heart, but it’s difficult not to stress.
I just need to keep pushing through and doing my best, and you know what? Tears, whether they’re of sadness or of joy (today has been a mix of both), can be a very good thing. I’d rather feel joy with the rain than have a million A’s.
Hey! Marissa! Guess what?! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY! AHHHH! I hope that your day was absolutely wonderful :D I miss you so much and can't wait until Christmas time (when we'll see each other again, yes?) Love you!
Aww, Judith! Thank you so much. (:
My birthday was so great. I am really blessed. (Totally going to be posting about it soon.)
I miss you, too! A lot a lot a lot. We will definitely see each other over for Christmas. (: Love you, too!
Happy birthday sweet sweet girl. I just want you to know that you are a great sister in Christ, and you inspire me in so many ways. I wish we lived closer because I feel like we would be good friends. I hope that your birthday is full of happiness, love, and memories. Have a good one! Love love love you!
So tonight’s my last night being eighteen years old.
I don’t know why nights like this always seems so important to me. Every day gone is different. I’ll never have October 11th, 2011 back, so why is October 12, 2011 any different? A year is only 365 days long because humans decided that it was. The day and night are really the only measurements of time that is built into nature. The rest of it is all decided by us.
I know this, and yet I’m still always sad to see it go. I wasn’t prepared to turn eighteen. I never really felt old enough to be eighteen. And tomorrow I’m going to be nineteen.
I don’t understand.
In so many ways, I still wish I was 14 years old. I hated how people were, and I hated how I was treated, but I was taken care of in so many different ways. I had so much more freedom. You think that the older you get, the more freedom you get, but in some ways it really doesn’t feel that way. You also have so much more responsibility that it almost creates more barriers.
I’m still really lucky now, though. I have a wonderful roommate who cares so much about me, and a fantastic boyfriend who has been bending over backwards to take care of me, especially in these past couple of days. Some people my age are really alone, and I’m not. Sometimes I feel like I am, but honestly, it’s just because I’m melodramatic and make things out to be so much worse than they actually are. I also have the best mom in the world who is doing the best she can to help me, even from the other side of the country.
So really, in this case, age is just a number. I’m not going to be any “older” tomorrow than I am today. The number that I call myself may change, but I’m really not going to be any different yet.
Around 2:00 this morning, I was sitting in one of the Goretti common rooms with Jay and all of the power went out. We didn’t think much of it because the backup generators put some of the safety lights on pretty quickly, but as we were leaving he asked one of the guys if the lights on their floor went out, too.
They told us that all of the lights in the city were out.
It was cool and freaky at the same time. I stopped at my dorm to drop some things off, but then we decided it would be fun to go exploring. The campus itself didn’t feel too different because of the backup generators. The hallway to my room was scary as heck, because the only lights that came on were the exit lights, so it was lit with a very dim red light. All of the stairwells had lights on, and the cafe and most of the student union was lit. It actually kind of bothered me that the lights in front of the oratory went out. I’m just so used to being able to see it all of the time that to look and see a dark space was worrisome. Lucky the key card things still worked so we were able to get in and out of places.
We ended up going to one of the balconies of the student union. The only lights we could see were two big lights from a plant near us and the elementary school. Everything else was dark. The stars from the balcony were beyond fantastic.
We sat up and talked for about an hour and a half before suddenly all of the parking lot lamps and town lights went back on. We stayed up for another hour and half, just being together.
The whole night was so sweet and romantic. I felt like I was in a movie.
The only sad part is that I just got an email saying the water might not be safe to drink and that we should boil our water to sanitize it. Yuck.